Many people struggle with coping with various aspects of the holiday season. If you are grieving a loss, any type of loss, it can be difficult to function, let alone participate during the holiday times. If you are recovering from drugs or alcohol, this can also be a difficult time due to trauma around the holidays, loneliness, or just the fact that maybe there is alcohol more easily accessible and at gatherings. If you are already struggling with anxiety and depression, the holiday demands can exacerbate symptoms. Even if you don’t suffer from a clinical diagnosable condition, you can still suffer from the “holiday blues”.

The National Institute of Mental Illness surveyed individuals in which 64% stated they are affected by the “holiday blues”. The holiday blues are temporary feelings of depression and anxiety felt around the holidays due to a variety of factors. Symptoms can include frustration, tension, a sense of loss, fatigue and sadness.

There are several things we can do around the holidays.

1. Set Boundaries. Though not always easy, I find that setting boundaries has helped me the most during the holiday season. Saying “no” when we need to without giving excuses as to why we can’t. “No” is a complete sentence. We need to do what is best for us, without fear or guilt of letting others down. It takes practice to set boundaries without feeling like we’ve devastated others. Family dynamics can also cause distress for a lot of people. You don’t have to feel guilty for putting yourself first.
2. Limit your alcohol intake. Whether you have an alcohol issue or not, alcohol is a depressant and can amplify feelings of depression and anxiety. Limit your intake at gatherings and try not to keep excessive amounts of alcohol at home.
3. Spend time with people who care. Though we want to set boundaries and say no when we need to, we also don’t want to isolate ourselves either. In particular, if we are feeling depressed, grieving or recovering from addiction, it is important we surround ourselves with people who love and care about us. Many support groups, whether that be for grief and loss, mental illness, addiction, or really anything else, have group meetings that run around and on the holidays. So, no matter what, you can surround yourself with others who care.
4. Get good sleep and exercise. The saying I hear most around the holidays is “I don’t have time”. Exercise can be as simple as an afternoon walk outside (the vitamin D is a plus too) and good sleep may mean giving yourself a “bedtime” and sticking with it.
5. Create new traditions. Sometimes we can get lonely or sad when thinking about old traditions or people who are no longer here to celebrate them with us. Perhaps there is other trauma around the holiday season that creates distress. Whether it’s going on vacation, going to an Alkathon (24 hours or more of AA meetings back to back) or deciding we don’t want to travel all over the globe in one day, creating new traditions can make a positive impact on our wellbeing and our holidays. We may even just want to put a new spin on old traditions, whatever that may be.
6. Seasonal depression. Seasonal depression is exactly what it sounds like and the darker, colder seasons tend to coincide with the holidays. If you are in New Jersey, we are talking really cold and dark. Continue with your hobbies during this time, continue to spend time with friends and family, and get yourself a sunlamp to help (but do your research first as some are better than other for seasonal depression).

7. Talk to a therapist. Though these tips can be helpful, they are substitutes for professional mental health and addiction help. Talk to a trained therapist if you’re suffering from a mental health or addiction issue or even if you’re experiencing the “holiday blues”.